Immortality

There aren't a lot times I feel like throwing out my modest and humble nature. As much as I try, I just end up telling myself that it isn't worth it to behave the in the perceived 'Maryite' manner (read: arrogant, snobbish, absolutely in the air, having an attitude, considering other people as dirt and not worth talking to). There are many more things I need to add to this list to complete it, but that would be another time.
Point is, I am a product of the school and I do have all of those 'qualities' (actually, I shouldn't even put this word is inverted commas, because I truly think that in the right kind of a person, these qualities are 100% what the word wants to portray). Somehow, I never seem to bring them out the extent that I have people cursing me for it.
But, today, I want to. I want to jump in the air and tell people that I am SO BLOODY GREAT!! I want the whole world to know that I have done great things and am going to do great things. I want people to walk up to me and ask for my autograph (or the medical equivalent of such a scene :-)). I want people to turn around and look at me twice and say, "Look, that's her!" Basically, I have reached immortality and I want to flaunt it. I want the whole college to know that my name has finally appeared on the Roll of Honour Board. BECAUSE IT HAS!! And it shall remain there, a proof of my achievement for generations to come :-)

Man, I feel like Gagan Narang right now. I don't have my name up there for three consecutive years or anything. But, I have it up there for that one year. That's enough to make me treasure it for a life time. An Olympic Medal is a medal- gold, silver, bronze...ultimately that podium finish is what every sportman dreams of. Congrats to Narang, by the way. He has actually made me believe that this hyped up Indian Contingent had some real people capable of delivering when it mattered.
Seeing my name on that board has ignited a flame inside me that wants it up there another time. I am going to work very hard to make that happen. Oh, and what made that moment extra special was that, I saw it on my  parents' wedding anniversary. The news and the photo made a very special gift for them. We have had 6 people from our family graduating from BJ Medical College. I'm the 7th and the 1st to have made it to that Roll of Honour. This is a matter of pride :-)

 Let's hope I deserve another try at this honour again :-))

p.s. I topped BJ in my 2nd year University Exams. That is what this post is related to. To read about it, refer to "From the Topper's Desk", dated February 25th, 2011.

The Expected and The Unexpected

Our Third Minor results were declared on 22nd February (Wednesday). I have come 2nd this time- an aggregate of 292/400 (73%). I also managed a Distinction in Ophthalmology :-)
I was so freaked out when I heard that the results were out online. I have never been the kind of a person to get freaked out by results, you know. I actually pride myself on my control and temperament at such a time. This time, however, things were different. For one, last year's accomplishment kept replaying itself in my head. I really don't care much about what people say or think, but after last year's score and the shock everyone got, I know I was probably the first person who's marks would be checked by one and all- "Lets see how much last year's topper scored!" I did not want to be a one-time lucky shot kinda thing. I have that talent and determination in me, and getting a good score this year would only serve to emphasise this very fact.
I know, for a fact, that I did not study as much as I should have this time. I definitely did NOT study as much as I had in my IInd year. I got involved in things other than pure academics, the Ophthalmology and Paediatrics Quiz came up, I wasn't in the right state of mind for a major part of my PLs...and there I was, telling myself I was well-prepared, when I knew I wasn't. It was too much to ask for a top rank. All I prayed for, was a score that would keep my integrity and my mindset intact.
Going back to the time I heard results were out, I couldn't get myself to go online. Instead, I did what I have never in my wildest dreams, thought I would do. I called up a school friend and told her to talk about everything other than results. Sweet that she is, she agreed and the next half hour was spent in chatting about everyday happenings in our parallel lives...It calmed me down. It really did. When I was ready, I went online to check my score.
Funny thing really, I got disappointed when I saw it. I thought I'd managed a 60%. The relief that a 300/400 gives my mind can obviously not be given by a 292/400, as close as it is to that 300. Well, and that 292 underlined the fact that there had to be people ahead of me. Human that I am, I was disappointed. The only aspect of my scorecard that brightened my mood, was that 76/100 in Ophthalmology. Now, I have Distinctions to boast about, in every exam until now :-) (Biochemistry, Pathology, Microbiology, Ophthalmology).
The topper this time has got 76%. There is a 12 mark difference between us. But, I know she deserves every bit of it and well, at least I came 2nd :-)
I hope I can do better than this in my Final Year. It is my last chance and I want to give it all I have. I know that I have it in me to get to that Rank 1 and 2....I can't get there 2 years in a row by fluke, right? I'm delighted that I could make my Mother (an Ophthalmologist) stand tall and say, "My daughter got a Distinction in Ophthalmology" :-) In fact, having also represented BJ in the Ophthalmology quiz, I have done all that is possible with that subject :-) That was my aim when I first fell in love with that subject in January 2011:-)
I'm a pleased person today. I have done well enough and I am pretty proud of that. It is another issue that my family is happier than I am...it is strange, how your loved ones can manage to make you happier than you actually feel :-)) Love you all, guys!! Thank You :-)