Friday, January 13, 2012

New Year's New Gift

On 30th December, I attended the Installation Ceremony of Rotary Club NIBM of district 3131. My Mom was made President. It was one of those enlightening moments, you know. You see what all you can do with this preciuos little thing called Life. I haven't really got hang of the Rotary culture yet, but it was pretty clear to me that to get to that place, I'd have to do something meaningful with my life. Only then would I be in the position to give back to the Society, the Rotary way.
Meaningful started with doing well in my practicals, waiting for me pretty patiently in the suceeding week. It wasn't an easy ride getting there. As is the case in any college, we have log books called "journals". We are supposed to complete these journals and get them signed from our Head of Unit and Head of Department before we arrive for our University practicals. Unfortunately this year, our Ophthalmology journals were lagging behind on the HoD signature and she was in mood to give them to us that easily.
I do get her point. We went to her three days before the University examinations started. And, most of us had simply copied from our senior's journals. But, ultimately, every teacher wants her students to pass the examination and we thought the same applied to her.
To our utter misfortune, it did not. In fact, she did not seem to have an ounce of pity, let alone love, for any of us. The day before the examination, she declared she wasn't going to sign our journals. Since my batch (Batch F) had Ophthalmology practicals on the first day, we got ready for the worst...lambs for slaughter sorts...only worse, because despite everything, we were going to live and have to bear the consequences of our (and her) actions.
Imagine my utter horrifying disbelief on the day of the examination, when I heard that I was to be the first student to go to her and give my Viva. Was I scared? Yes. Not because I wouldn't be able answer anything, but because for the first ever time in a University Practical, I was carrying an incomplete journal. I should say I was lucky. I answered most of her questions and she didn't ask much about the journal. After hearing the conversations (if I may call them that - the students didn't really talk :-p) she had with the people after me, I was glad I got off easy...phew.. Ophthalmology was ok, actually...I could obviously have done better. But, thats just my love for the subject talking. In the past year, I just don't seem to have learnt the meaning of 'toning down'. I need to be the best at Ophthalmology, whatever may happen. I know it has hurt my chances of doing well, because I pushed myself too hard at that thought rather than doing it in action. It is over now, and finally, I can only pray that the examiner decides that I AM the best, and gives me marks to suit that statement.
With ENT, it was the opposite end of the pole. All I cared about, was passing in the subject. I think my problem with ENT has been a two-legged one. I don't like it and I don't understand it. There is no sane reason why that should be the case. I, personally, think it has to do with Genetics. When my Mom was pregnant with me, she was doing a one year residency in ENT. She couldn't stand it one bit. The thoughts got transferred to me at that time. So ultimately, I knew I hated the subject, even before I could reason out why. When I did reason out why, I found it had a lot to do with another subject I hated - Anatomy. ENT deals with the part of Anat I was never particularly good at - Head and Neck. With the 'brilliant' experience of Anatomy dealt with and over and done with, over two years ago, ENT dug out hidden skeletons and a lot of indecisiveness and insecurity.
I know that, when I write today, I have finished with ENT and I am surely passing in the subject. It doesn't make me happy. It makes me relieved. I have put a lot of work into pushing myself to the position where I can manage to be in a positive frame of mind with ENT. And that can only make place for relief. My practical was quite ok, actually. I wouldn't have thought of asking for a better practical. I can say this for sure, because when I was walking back from the department, I felt victorious for having gone through it and come out, all in one piece. With a stable mind :-)
Moving on to the third subject for the year - PSM. That practical was easily the best of the three. I know for sure that I have got my 20 marks of spots and biostats right. If not 20, at least 18 is garuanteed. And I had a good and a very good viva :-) The only crappy part of the practical was the time span - 8 am to 4:30 pm. There were seven of us left to complete the theory viva, when the examiners decided to go have lunch. It tested our patience. Every single bit. As one of my friends put it, "First they gave us a 40 day Prep leave only for the Practicals, then they gave us a 4 day Prep Leave only for PSM, and now they're giving us a 4 hr leave only for the Grand viva!!!" Ultimately, we all ended up chatting about the latest advertisements, the sitcoms, the stupidest jokes ever, all the PSM textbooks lying forgotten on the side. When the Examiners did come, all we wanted was to just finish off with the whole damn thing.
I think the New Year's gift this time, was good :-) there was definitely no let down in any way. And I am sure I shall be able to do well enough to remain mentally stable :-)
I have 4 days off now. 4 days before I go back the Year that is known to seep out every bit of energy left inside you. Vast subjects, no time, and things running like bullet trains. Thats what 2012 is going to be all about. Hopefully, by the year end, I shall have lived to re-tell the whole story with laugh :-) if not that, I shall still be telling the story any way :-) Happy New Year's to one and all!!
If this the year the world's going to end, lets end with a resounding happy bang!!! :-))  

No comments: