The Pathology of Boredom

I wish for a lot of things. Always. Right now, however, I only wish I could make my life a little more interesting. A lot more interesting. There's absolutely nothing to look forward to when I wake up every morning. Except for a day filled with hours of studying and half hour breaks. Even my PLs last year weren't so boring. I guess, this time it is the combination of a lot of PLs and the same old chapters to be done all over again.
I fear I might not be able to do my best when Exams finally arrive (it doesn't seem like 'finally' though. Two weeks down the line, I'll be talking about how there's hardly any time left!!). I feel I'm not really putting an effort right now and that is going to hamper my prospects. In the race to finish and stick to my time table, I think I'm going to end up not doing  lot of things properly.
I gotta get back to studying now actually. Next time, I am going to write a bigger post. :-)

Anti-Arrythmics...they don't even make sense!

It has been told to us that Anti-Arrythmics is not very important. According to a very enthusiastic teacher of mine, “they don’t expect you to know it!” In college, it is such a blessing to hear things like that. I mean, it saves you a lot of time that you would have otherwise spent doing the theory and, in case of this chapter, wondering why things can get so difficult at times.

So, you can imagine how lovely life is, and then I get this crazy idea to check out last year’s University papers. A macho kind of a thing, you know-the desire to say, “I can totally answer the questions, and I’m well-prepared even now, months before the exam”.

And, I come straight crashing out from my lovely world, because hell, there is a long question on Anti-Arrythmics in that Pharmacology paper!!!! So, today, I decided to do the chapter and now, I am begging anybody who reads this post: if you have any idea that can make this chapter easier and more understandable, I’d love the help. Frankly, I’ve never liked Cardiovascular System in Pharmacology. Everything depends on the patient and ten thousand illnesses that he may have. But, I’ve been getting a hang of it, and I should at least be in a position to be able to decide the drugs to be given, in simple cases.

With Anti-Arrythmics, however, that is so not the case. If I get a question on it, yeah, I guess I am in a position to attempt it and get at least 3 out of  the 6 marks allotted to that question. It’s just the practicality of my knowledge that I’m not sure of. So any help would be willingly and happily accepted!!

And, we supposedly have the final combined signing tomorrow. Let’s hope the story is true and that we finish off with the official work after all!  

Time to waste: I'd have asked for it!!

It is a said thing, and definitely an understood one, that the week following the end of exams is supposed to be a 'chilled-out' week; one that involves no textbooks, no 2 a.m. mornings, no racing hearts and a free, escapade kind of a feeling. It is also understood that when the week follows the end of Prelims, we are not going to get any of the above mentioned gifts. Instead, we are going to be handed numerous other ways which will help us understand the meaning of "WASTE of time".
I wish these people could step into our shoes for a moment and experience what we experience when time just seems to vanish in front of our eyes, and we do nothing!
The most cruel Department in terms of time, is our dear, dear Forensic Medicine Department. I understand that they are short-staffed, and that there is a lot of work they have to do. But, if that is the case, then they might as well, complete the entire work and then call us to the Department, right? But, it seems like they are hell-bent on teaching us the true value of wastage. We were called, first at 10:30 am in the morning for paper-signing. I din't go, because it is my experience that things never really happen in the Department. As expected, they announced that papers would be corrected by 3 pm and that we should assemble at that time.
With an increasing feeling of reservation about the entire set-up, I decided I'd go any way. And we were made to sit there, in that Lecture hall, from 3 pm to 7:30pm, doing absolutely NOTHING! Each time, we made plans to go home, we were told that the signing would start in hr hour. It was so frustrating! They could easily have taken one person's cell phone number and then contacted him, when it was all done. It would have saved us a lot of agony and hatred towards that department.
My entire week has been like this. Only the Pharmacology Department has been a little time-savvy.
All I want to say is, if I really had wanted to waste time in this way, I'd have asked for it. But, now, here I am, with wasted time, and the regret that it wasn't even wasted well! I know Government institutions are mismanaged, but I guess the optimistic heart never fails to keep hoping!!...(sigh...)        

Prelims: the Finish-line

Time to celebrate a bit :-)

2.5 weeks, and the ordeal is OVER! In the past two weeks, I've suffered and learnt real meanings of words like "Patience", "Frustration", "Insomnia", "Acidity" and most importantly, the mantra that "good things never always happen to good people", and that at times you never get what you really deserve.
The marks don't count- not when it comes to the satisfaction I've derived from every question I've answered. And at the same time, they really do count. If I end up getting less than I expect, I'm going to feel betrayed and again ascertain that this is one unfair world. If I more than I expect, I'm only going to put it down as my amazing luck. Please note, nowhere do I blame myself for the results. Typical student attitude. We just don't ever want to say, "We just din't study enough." Fact is, it isn't easy to do all the studying, and frankly, I can't bear to even think of how I've spent the last 2.5 weeks. I wish I could predict when I'm going to learn that doing my entire portion the night before the exam, is sheer foolishness! Yet, I can answer a part of that. It is only when I feel confident enough ( that is, after having done my portion at least three times over), that I can entertain such a thought. Currently, all I want to do is, take a few days ( hours out of days actually)off, and just relax. I want to do things that are going to make me want to get back to studying with enthusiasm, not with the resigning attitude that I so feel I am going develop soon.
So, how were my exams? Pretty ok. The papers were good. Except for a disaster that Micro 2 might turn out to be, and a catastrophe that Forensic is going to be ( I will eat a boiled eggplant if that doesn't turn out to be true!), the rest was definitely on the verge of good. My patience and the ability to stay hungry for 5 hours was tested big time during the Pathology practicals. I am not very good at staying hungry. During exams, no way. The tension and the atmosphere of the practical hall make a lethal combination. The moment my stomach gets a little empty, the brain starts to talk about putting in some HCl in there, and I suffer from vague symptoms of hypoglycemia and acidity. Patho was the height of it all. I was the 2nd last person to go for the viva, and finished at 5:30 pm. And I had had lunch at 11:45am.
Forensic (FMT) was another tester. This time, completely testing our ability to patiently wait....wait....wait...wait...wait...wait......and wait. I was there for the practical from 10 am in the morning to 5 pm in the evening. Had that 2nd viva not turned out to be awesome, I would've been ready to send a body in there for a post-mortem!!( kidding....I woud've just chucked the thoughts of FMT aside any way!!)
What have I learnt from my prelims? Firstly, I totally understand why a senior of mine, gave a post-exam party after her prelims had gotten over last year. The feeling CANNOT be described! You fly in the air, as high as you can go, feel the breeze blast past you and yet not hurt a single cell....suddenly swoop down and catch hold of all those small and special things you wanted to do for so long......and have a great night's sleep without worrying about those alarms that have been dissolving dreams within seconds, for the past 2 weeks.
And, I learnt that doing things on instinct does work to your advantage, making your paper go much better than it might have gone otherwise. I also learnt that everything has to end finally, so it is obviously going to a much better finish-line, if you stop losing your head and health over small things. :-)            

Prelims : The Forecast

10 days left for the Prelims to start, and I am having panic-attacks and the absolute urge to throw away my books, in cycles. It is hard to keep so many things inside a small head, as many mnemonics that one may want to come up with. To top this, I have, once again, fallen prey to my delicate health, which seems to wait and wait and wait for that right moment (two weeks before the exam) and then collapses like a sand castle against the ocean waves. I was fine through out the past two months; Hell, I’ve never been better health-wise. People around me fell ill, every day…..every day a new virus made its existence clear around me. But, exams are the food that these organisms need when I’m concerned.

I might be able to complete my portion, but, there’s no way I can even tell myself that I’m ready for the Prelims. It’s so simple. I can start months before, or days before. I still won’t be able to believe that I know everything!! I’m just hoping I can get past this barrier ok. Then there is a two month preparation leave, when I hope I can do things more systematically and less hurriedly…..

It’s my birthday on the 14^th!! Of course, I’m studying throughout the day, and there are not going to be any surprises like last year. But, it’s my birthday!! And I have reason to rejoice for those 24 hours!!!!

Best of luck to me for the horror that awaits. 20^th September, here we come!!!!!! 

Competitiveness

The urge to compete, the urge to win, the urge to somehow get ahead in a never-ending race of examinations.....
And I have suddenly got it!! I swear, I was never into the business of wanting to get more marks than somebody else, of wanting to study more, of wanting to KNOW that I am the better. I have been laid-back in life, in studying actually.
I have this crazy, maddening feeling that I need to perform better than some others. In fact, I now believe that I can do it. I know it might be tough and can definitely take a toll on me, but I simply want to do it all. I don't know exactly how this has got into me. But, I can say that the feeling has been building up. It started with my Gynaec term and the great reviews I got there, was carried on by my Pyschiatry Term-end, in which I ended up with the highest marks in the batch (37/50). Anaesthesia added another boost by coming up with a 20/25 in the MCQ test. Then, there have been the results of the current terminal examination. I have got the highest marks in the theory examination of Microbiology (38/50), and I think I did pretty well in Pathology (theory) also to get 39.5/50. I wish I had got better teachers to take the viva. I would have done much better than 26.5 and 23 respectively.
My point is that, I finally think I'm going in the right direction and that things are working well for me (touchwood). It is just like the form of a sportsperson. At times, you are at your best and all the hard work just helps you do much than you normally would have. Other times, you can do the best your body can manage, but you still don't reach the peaks that you have set yourself. Right now, I feel confident, I feel I am capable of doing things I want to do, I feel comfortable with all the marks, and I don't feel the pressure to perform. I want to perform and I  know I will. I just am so excited to start (and Parasitology only makes things even spicier!!).
So, with all the focus coming in, I love and enjoy Medicine even more. What more can a student want?

Micro, I Love You!!

I do, I do, I do.....Never thought I'd be saying this, when I initially started with second year. I thought Pharmac was going to be my cup of tea. Guess, I'm not all that different from the rest of the crowd after all.
So, our Micro Quiz eliminations were held on Saturday. I can't say that I studied a lot, or that I spent sleepless nights, studying up a storm, but I did as much as I could. And I think I did pretty well in the Eliminations. I did not get chosen for the final team of two, but I came third. By one mark. So, I'm a back up for the team. I'm still going to attend the extra lectures, because I really feel that I can DO Microbiology, and that something just clicks really well. So I want to learn it, another way, and another way, and a fourth way is there is one.
This is something that clicked me after my Micro paper during the terminals. It had gone pretty well, especially the MCQs. So, I just like doing Micro. And, of course, I can't imagine myself doing Pharmac or Patho for days together, but I can imagine that happening with Micro. And I loved solving the MCQs on Friday, as a preparation for the elims. It was so much of fun!!! Plus, the teacher conducting the elims, told me, "Good Performance!". Now when that happens in a subject, you are bound to like a wee bit more than normal, rite? :-)
So, I'm doing Parasitology now. I love the new book feel. I'm doing it from Arora and Arora. After a year of reading the same old textbooks, I literally pounced on this one. I like it. It is said to be the toughest part of Microbiology, but, I'm on a high right now, and I really want to finish a major chunk of the syllabus in Parasito.
Do I regret not being a part of the team? I do. Especially when it was a matter of one mark. But, the responsibility now is less, and I can enjoy and study, both. Hell, I really did not want to meet my uncle who's coming down from the USA with the kids, regretting every moment I spend with them, because it was cutting into my study time. So, I can meet him with a clear conscience, and also study as much as I want to, at the same time. And I can attend the extra lectures. There isn't a ban on them. So, somehow, the regret or sadness or whatever you may want to call it, is a very small part of all the emotions I felt at that time, or those that I feel even now. I guess, I'm really happy that I didn't do very badly, to crash all my hopes of doing well in Micro down to the very depth of the Earth.
And my next target is: Distinction in Microbiology. And by more than just ONE mark!!!!!

Why does it keep following me???

I haven't written about this before. There is a crappy book called 'JOURNAL' which we are supposed to record our cases in, in every clinical posting. They have a certain number of cases to be seen in every term, which we have to record. Until the Gynaec term started, we didn't really bother about writing journals. But, the Naik Unit ensured that we wrote the entire semester work and get it all signed. As my luck would have, I couldn't get all my stuff signed in time, and hence, due to consistent trailing behind him, the Chief-Resident (CR), knew me pretty well. He even told the HOU that I did not have my journal signed but that I was a very good student. Later on, when he did check my journal, he told me that the HOU, Dr. Naik, was very happy with me. She was delighted that I had done so well, and that I knew my Gynaec stuff pretty well. I was obviously shocked. She had asked me really simple stuff, as I have written before in the entry dated......I was also delighted that after spending days screaming, "Gynaec!!!SOS!!!!!!!!!!!", I actually knew enough to impress a teacher!

Two months down the line, I was again haunting the corridors of Gynaec, as we began our Family-Planning posting. Little did I know that another shocker of sorts awaited me here. My Posting began on June 1st, in the middle of our college holidays. There were hardly any people attending the posting, 'coz every hostelite had run home. We were 5 in number, for the first few days. During that time, the Senior-Resident (SR) took our lectures. I used to answer quite a bit. Hell, I knew stuff so why not let them know that I do. So, the SR took a fancy to me. She'd ask me questions when the others couldn't answer and all that sort of a thing. I did not go for the MTP OPD one day. The next day she said that she hadn't felt like teaching when she saw that I wasn't there. Oh God, why Gynaec!!! Later, during the posting, we were in the Labour Room, and she even made me hold the placenta, as she taught us about the parts and features. I, kinda, became a favourite. Man!

We finished with our Family-Planning term-end today. Finally! It wasn't held before the exams because that way, we wouldn't have attended all the days till the 30th (exams were from 28th June-8th July). It got postponed from 10th July ( the initially decided date) to today. And it turned out to be pretty good. Dr. Bhalerao (the HOU this time), asked me about everything that I knew about Oral Contraceptive Pills. And I was able to answer a lot of his questions. It turned out to be pretty good, especially after the heavy weight of the 'favourite' tag on me. Thankfully that SR wasn't there, and Dr. Bhalerao doesn't know me. He did not say that I needed to read up a lot more or that my basics weren't clear. Which is a good sign.

I just so don't want to do Gynaec!!! I wish I could have gotten so much of appreciation and support in some other term uptil now. But, I end up having the feeling that I don't like Gynaec, and yet, I know it best!!        

Lost....

So the World Cup reached its finish line in style, and splendor and in the very spirit of it has been since the start - a perfect all-nation party. I LOVED the closing ceremony...especially when the flags came up, with people walking along unveiling them...seeing them together makes me believe that unity can exist in this world, and it so strange that unity and brotherhood can only be associated with sports and nothing else. Frankly, I would never dream of watching so much of enthusiasm, and support in any other field. Kudos to the world of Sports for keeping the meaning of these words alive, despite the encroachment that Politics has made.
The final could not have been more different from the prior games. The tension and nerves were visible, as the game was more of trying to simply get a goal rather than making one. It wasn't the best game Spain has played, and definitely isn't too high on the list of great games for Holland either. Yet, I guess, Casillas' tears and the bright  smiles on the faces of the Spanish players made up for everything that the game was not. In the past two years, Spain has risen as a great sporting nation, with successes in Football, Tennis (I was so delighted to see Rafa's picture with Casillas and the Trophy...it made my day!!!), Cycling and Golf. It is uplifting to see the united celebrations amongst the people in every success.
The only thing I am disappointed about is that, this is the End. There isn't anything coming up in the world of sports for about a month, and I feel lost! I'd become so used to watching the French Open, then the World Cup and Wimbledon, interrupted by cricket here and there; I always had something to watch. Now, there isn't anything worth watching, and frankly, there's no use of turning the television on. So I'm totally LOST...
Happens a lot of times, but this year, with the World Cup, I didn't feel it would be that much...on the contrary it is much more, guess it is because the festival reached a high point and just ended...

The journey called the World Cup

The only reason I supported Spain during the Euro 2008 was because there were a lot of Liverpool players in the squad. And Bingo!! They won!
The World Cup is a different story. The team started off on the worst foot any one could have possibly imagined. 0-1 defeat to Switzerland wasn't a part of the script. But, they have bounced back, and today, on July 11th, 2010, they are on the brink of making History. Frankly, it isn't easy to watch a team win by margins like 1-0, in fact, games like that get boring. But, the game that Spain plays is simply weaving magic. one can just watch them pass the ball, keep the possession, and thread through the opposition's defence, almost effortlessly. It is so beautiful! Their game isn't about the goal-scoring or the physical aspect of football. It's about wearing the opposition down, moving through them, tapping the ball around. It feels like music; every game, a new tune, so pleasant to to the eyes, a treat to watch....the rhythm, the sync, everything, so different, so new. The margin of victory never tells it, but every game is a musical to look out for.
The Armada has grown in confidence. To beat teams like Germany, you have to have faith in your abilities to score, faith in your ability to nudge the Jabulani around.
I don't really understand the intricacies of the game. To me, football was always a rough, muddy and u-push-me-I-push-you game. Watching this team, I have witnessed something totally different. Something so new, it makes the game look as beautiful as a match of tennis.
On the other hand, there stand the Dutch. A very different technique, yet so similar. Their game is so much more physical, involving getting the ball, rather than keeping it....their techniques have flourished too....and they have grown more confident than ever. Beating in-form teams like Brazil, rather dismantling them in 45 mins of a game isn't an easy task. And since that momentous victory, the Dutch have only moved forward to the one place that they deserve- Soccer City Stadium.
I root for Spain, simply 'coz, they're my team this World Cup. I hope they win, because they have to play a better game than the Dutch. But, as a football fan, I only want this game to be as wonderful and exciting, as it expected to be, and finally, I want the best team to win. The World Cup needs a new and worthy winner, and the two teams today are the ONLY contenders for it!
GO SPAIN!!      

II/II Over!!

So exams are finally over. I sit here, pondering upon the last two weeks and thinking, I’ve done it!! Now, I only have to worry about studying after about two days. The past week and four days have been enlightening. Firstly, I know for sure that doing Pharmac just the one time, isn’t enough. My paper was no way better than last time, when  I hadn’t even completed my portion properly. And, today, the practical also sent across the same message. It isn’t just enough to have a chapter underlined and marked and coloured and full of charts. You need to know those charts by heart. My aim in the coming few months will be the same. We will, of course, have the entire portion now, for the prelims. If it has been tough the last two times, the prelims are going to be complete torture. ‘Coz there will also be two papers of each subject.

I have also learnt in the past week that my study method for Microbiology is pretty much what it should be. My paper was the best out of all my theory papers and the same can be said about the practical. This means I’m sure about a lot of stuff I have said and written. So, I love Microbiology and would love to make it my strong-point in the coming months.

Pathology still remains a kind of mystery. I loved it when we were doing General Pathology. And I hated it when we were doing Systemic Pathology. It is vast, and this time I haven’t read much of Robbin’s (a total change from last time, when most of the portion had been read from that thick little green book). I didn’t end up getting a lot of marks last time although my paper had been the best of all the three we wrote. I want to see whether reading Harsh Mohan makes a difference in the marks we get. I am going to finish reading up Robbin’s by the prelims, but I need to know whether it is going to be for the sake of reading it, or whether it is going to help me in getting the marks that I’m currently after.

PSM (Preventive and Social Medicine) has been labeled the disaster my third year, before the year even starts with the kind of crap it dished out to me in this term. According to the schedule of MUHS, students are tested on PSM in II/II. A 3-hr theory paper (with 3 compulsory 8 mark questions!!) and a 20 mark practical. That theory paper turned out to be the only paper I have EVER given without studying ANYTHING! The standard textbook is Park’s and it one hell of a boring book to read. I didn’t manage to do anything the whole evening before the exam. And then, the morning of the paper I came to know that there are notes available in PSM. I only managed to get the notes 2 hours before the paper, and I also had to have lunch. So, I went for the paper having read NOTHING. It turned out to be a disaster really. I haven’t written such crappy answers in such beautiful handwriting ever before! The practical was no better. The lecturer who took my viva, realized early into it that I did not know one small thing. I don‘t think I’m going to be passing in the subject this time.

FMT was pretty ok. The Department didn’t even know we had a paper! We started ah hour and a half late, because of all the confusion. They distributed éclairs as a penalty for forgetting that they had to conduct an examination J

Basically, I’m finally done with everything. Not everything, actually. My family-planning term-end is left, which will be held on Saturday. But I am free as such. I missed out on enjoying the Wimbledon and the Football World Cup, as much as I would have in another time span. But, luckily, Rafa and the Spanish Football team, have ensured that I have watched it all throughout. Congrats Rafa !! It was such a fulfilling moment to watch you lift that trophy! And I gotta say to Tomas Berdych ( I watched him beat Roger and Novak Djokovic), you are so totally all over the place!! It was great to see you play in the final, and I do want you to keep playing the brand and level of tennis that you are. Your serve…..simply sensational!

And that Football team! Switzerland seems in a different universe. I so want you to win the World Cup now!! You beat Germany! I am so proud of them all!! I hope to witness you guys raising that Cup as high as possible on Sunday :-)

I’ve actually had a great week. Guess, having exams did pay its dividends in some ways:-)    

My Brother BEST!!!!!

Rutwik, my younger brother, has made me the proudest and happiest sister ever!! His Std. 10 ICSE Board Exam results were declared on Wednesday (19th May), and he has topped the guys in the City with 97%!! He has got amazing marks and has finished with the highest marks in five out of seven subjects in his school. He got 100/100 in Social Studies and in Environmental Studies.
I am just so, so, so proud of him. Feel like screaming out the entire world that he has topped in the entire city. When my results were declared four years back, I had come 2nd in the city and had also beaten the Boys' Topper. At that time, it had felt awesome too. This time, with my brother appearing, I was hoping he'd manage to be the Boys' Topper. And he is!! Anything less than this would definitely have hurt a bit. he has gotten the highest honour (to call it so) there can be in this city.
His photos have been splashed in newspapers and today, my mom stands as the proud mother of two ICSE toppers with pictures in the newspapers with both of them :-) She obviously feels elated and extremely proud of my brother. But, I am completely over the moon. Hell, I'd never known what my brother felt when he heard about my results. I always wondered whether his happiness had matched mine. Today, I know what it feels like. And, we may not show it as much as the actually rank-holder, but our happiness can even go beyond their's!!
I've always felt and known that Rutwik was definitely the more talented of the two if us, and more intelligent too. If there was any one in the family who could have beaten the 96% I'd set 4 years back, it had to be him. He's meant for so many greater things than this, but I wanted this to be a start. And for all the crazy, sporty things he has ended up doing for last 10 years in his school (including all the complaints from teachers), he deserves this more than anything else. The guy is an absolute genius! And I want him to come to B.J. Medical College, but if there is anything, simply, ANYTHING, that can provide him with medical education better than that, I want him to go for it. Because he deserves every single bit of it.
As an elder sister, it has always been my responsibilty to take care of him, and to love him. It would pain so bad to see talent like him wasting away in the dirt of the playground in school. I would wish so many times that he understood what he really possessed. Today, I feel I don't have that responsibilty any more; because my brother has grown up, he has become mature and understands what he wants; because, he knows what he needs to do to get it; because he will do everything in his power and beyond to get it; because he is a winner with that killer-instinct, and knows it.
I am so proud to have a family like mine. My mother and uncles have been rank-holders too. My cousin has got almost every scholarship there is to get, and currently is working like a madman to get onto the Indian team for the Mathematics Olympiad later this year. Among the youngest cousins of mine, the elder of the tiny-tots is busy winning prizes and certificates for projects that even my Uncle has a hard time understanding! Oh God, I feel so so lucky. I love my family and I hope this streak of winners never runs out. I want us to become great people and make our parents and grandparents proud. I want us to be able to change the world in our way. And, I want my brother to keep working hard and weaving the magic that he has got hold of now. Thank you for everything bro!! You are simply the BEST :-)        

The Vacation Approaching

The two term-ends did end up happening. I should say that Anaesthesia was much much better than Radiology. Firstly, because we got new questions and I knew quite a lot of them. And secondly, because an MCQ test doesn't end up making the Examiner tired of looking at Students' faces as they come in and go out. We even discussed the answers after the test was over. I got around 20 of them. So that means I am safe and will not get a re-term on the basis of my marks. Getting a re-term on the basis of attendance is another issue.
Radiology was long, tiring and, in the end, very boring. There was just one teacher taking the term-end for 50 students..And I wasn't even from the current batch. So I had to wait even longer to get it done with. Finally, when my turn came, the only question asked to me was "What abnormality do you see in the X-Ray in front of you?" I replied, "Cardiomegaly" "How do you assess cardiomegaly?" "By measuring the Cardio-Thorasic ratio (CTR)." She then explained how to measure the ratio. We then talked about Echocardiography and that's that. She gave me 25. That hurt a bit. I wish I could have gotten a chance to tell her more about what all I knew. I definitely deserved more than 25. But the fact is that I finished off with both my term-ends. The headache and continued nagging inside of me has been trampled upon, even if that means that the numbers aren't very heavy. 
We now have Ohpthalmology. Three of us went to the OT today, but it is shut for some maintenance till Wednesday. I really wanted to go have a look today. Very disappointing not to be able to do it. I don't think I am going to have any enthusiasm left till Wednesday, so I'm going to turn my attention to what I had planned to do in the pre-vacation. I have to finish big chunks of my Pathology and Pharmacology portion till Sunday. I am trying my level best to get that done.

Two term-ends coming up!!....I hope...

I finally finished with all my Anaesthesia cases. Wow! A relief! I couldn't get sleep on Monday night thinking about how many of them I had left!! I kept telling myself that I should be able top complete three cases the next day so that I'd have a shot at finishing them all, well in time. The sleepless night paid its results, and today I stand (rather, sit) in front of the computer proud to have taken all 10 cases complete with the signatures and everything.
My Anaesthesia term-end is on Saturday only. We tried to make the lecturer take it tomorrow, but the attempt was pretty futile. I don't know how it is going to be possible to give two term-ends on one day. But, I want to finish off with both then. I don't want that Radiology term-end to get postponed to 30th May!!
I've started studying for the Terminal exams coming in the last week of June. I do hope I will be able to do just fine, and not disappoint myself once for a change.
That is actually it. Nothing else going on in college right now. The atmosphere is one of gloom, tension and exams...

On the Other Side of a Break

Radiology turns out to be a strange subject. The aura around it is amazing. It is one of those ungettable things, you only study for and wish to do your post-graduation in. It is a branch that has money, doesn't have a lot of odd working hours, and also makes you an integral part of the patient's treatment, but at the same time, you have to study beyond limit for the same. And, as we learnt from our posting of 15 days, it isn't a very interesting subject to listen to.

I guess, teachers do decide the love you tend to feel for anything. And, as good doctors as they may be, the people in the Radiology department did not turn out to be great teachers. We learnt something, but had it not been for my prior decision to include the subject on my "I'd-like -to-do-my-PG-in-this" list, I'd have hated it.

I still have to give my term-end. The break ate up 30th April, when I should have given it. But, since it was amazing, I don't care much. I'm hoping to give the term-end on 15ht May.

Moving onto Anaesthesia, man! it is one BORING subject!!! We just seem to be running around doing clerical work, copying cases down, and then having to listen to one lecturer screaming her head off at us, as if we were posted in the Department for that very purpose. I still have 7 more cases left, and I hope to finish them off in 2 days. Frankly, I'm not very interested in the subject. And, also I'm hoping ardently that Anaesthesia takes the term-end one day before the term ends (i.e., on Friday), so that I can be free to give the Radiology term-end on Saturday.

SO, the other side of the break doesn't have very exciting things coming up. It is gut-wrenching to have nothing to look forward to. But, I think the break came at a vert apt time, so I can't be complaining much, can I?

Psychiatry gives me a surprise!!

The 15 day posting ended on 15th April. Haven't exactly been the mood to write since then. Today, I am.

So Psychiatry. Wow! There is something, an inherent, ever-present sentiment.....a disbelief of sorts, that these clinicians can remain Doctors, sane-headed Doctors. It is interesting to listen to the calm and off-hand manner in which the patients speak. Stories seeming to be absolutely impossible, are said with such belief, it is SCARY. These people have a weird expressionless look in their eyes. Apart from that, extremely normal. And, of course, in our posting, we learnt about :

1. Schizophrenia

2. Bipolar Affective Disorder with Psychotic signs

3. Manic Episodes

Almost every second patient seemed to suffer from some kind of auditory and visual hallucinations.

That way, a very easy case to diagnose.

The Mental Retardation cases were heart-wrenching. We had a case of two 27 yr old brothers, who were mentally reatarded in the severest way. They couldn't utter a word , only identified individuals. Their father looked so old and worn-out and tired, I couldn't get his image out of my head for a very long time (stilll can't). The world is such an unfair place. Firstly, people are financially unequal, and to top that, the lowest class of people have to suffer from such disasters. Disasters that need the financial help to run a decent course, a course that is manageable. A mentally-retarded child is loved despite everything by his parentsm probably, even more because of his condition. It is killing to imagine, being in that 60 yr old father's shoes, wondering about the future of his two children, after he may be well beyond the capacity to provide for them....to imagine how he has spent all these years having to look after two children, he could never expect himself to hate or be taken away from him, and yet at times, wish for the same. It aches so much, and I felt relief, and still do, when he mentioned that he also has another son and daughter.

This is the only part of being a doctor that I don't like. Some patients, with the baggage they bring along, touch the most sensitive part of my soul, and almost always, I wish I could run away from it all, and never feel all this stuff.

Any way, I topped in Psychiatry. 37/50!!! It a second. After having got our Gynaec journals checked, the CR told me I did amazingly well in the term-end, and that our HOU was very happy with me. Now this. I feel previleged and lucky. I'm finally making some headway, and it feels like it. So satisfying, and a confirmation that I have chosen the right field.

Our current posting is Radiology. Very interesting. The best part of it is, the posting gets over by 11 30 am. So I easily get about an hour and a half in the library. Plus, I really like it, and the branch is one of my choices for a PG in.

My ICMR project didn't get selected. Only three out of like an easy 15, got selected. I'll still be doing it. The news was saddening, but I don't want my research being wasted, and I intend to see this project through.

Thats about it. We're going to Mauritius next week. I am SO excited!!! Can't wait! And I will write before we leave... I promise myself that.

Over At Last!!

I don't have to look at gynae and babies being born for another two years now!!!! Such a relief I say.

We finally finished with the last part of the term-end today. It wasn't brilliant, but it wasn't bad either. I could answer quite a bit, and over all, did not leave the room red-faced having embarrassed myself to the core. I was asked about the Sim's Speculum, the some drugs used in Obstretics - Oxytocin, Carboprost, Misoprost and Mala-D, the OCP. The viva did not last very long. We didn't even have any questions on normal labour or the maternal pelvis and fetal skull, which I had done more painstakingly than the rest. Actually, if I had been told that the pelvis isn't even kept on the viva table, I wouldn't have bothered at all!!

Any way, it doesn't matter. Fact is, it is over. 2 months.....can't even believe it has been that long. Feel like just yesterday we had started with the posting, and I was so disgusted with the nature of the branch. The past months have been fun obviously. Every batch of students gets closer to each other because of clinical postings, one or the other. In case of the first twenty students, it was their paediatrics posting, in case of roll no.s 25-40, it was their Gynae posting. In our case, i guess it was this posting only. its not anything different than normal. But, I can bear the people in my batch a lot more easily. And I have an easier time, shunning out the talk of people I don't want to listen to. It is just that simple.

In case of Surgery, and to a certain extent, Medicine, we did not really connect. Lots of irritating moments, when I wondered why I had ended up in a batch like mine; when I felt like slapping some people on their faces as hard as I could, and just throw them out of the batch. Trust me, it wasn't the simplest thing meeting them everyday. But, I guess, you do get used to some things when you do them every day. It is just that, with me.

Our unit might not be the most interesting unit, or the most intelligent. But, there's something about it that I am proud of. And, well, although I'm over the moon that Gynae is over, I'm equally excited about our next posting. It is Psychiatry, and I'm very eager to move into that mode. Looking forward to the weirdest patients there might be......:-))

Gynae, SOS!!!!

My Gynae term has almost come to an end, and I don't feel like I've anything new. Yeah, actually, it's wrong to say that. I have learnt something. But, there's no feeling of achievement, of having learnt something that can make me want to do Gynae. In fact, the feelings are the exact opposite.

Having watched children being born, I am not exactly awed by the procedure. Contrary to that, I'm grossed out by it all. And I have huge respect for any woman who has gone through it all. Man, we have a tough life, don't we?

Our term-end was divided into 4 parts:

1. Complete Journal - 5 marks

2. A short viva by our HOU - 5 marks

3. Case Presentation - 15 marks

4. Table Viva - 15 marks

Points 2. and 3. are over, and they were good. I got a Previous Lower Segment Caesarean Section case, and I enjoyed answering the questions. Trust me, the only enjoyable experience this whole term has been this part of the term-end. The journal completion was hell, and I still have to get it signed.

The last part of the term-end will be held on Monday. I am sort of dreading that, because this is the real test. Of knowledge, application, understanding and of course, the pre-requisite of Medicine - memory. I hope I do well.

The next terms we will have are 15-day terms - Radiology, Anaesthesia, Ophthalmology and Psychiatry. I'm excited about them.

College has been full of interesting academic activities, the latest being the Dr. V.S. Prayag Memorial Oration by Dr. Velu Nair, on Stem Cell Therapy and its future. It was a very interesting take.

Last weekend, we also attended our first Clinico-Pathological Correlation Seminar, popularly termed as CPC. It was a typhoid case. Every department involved presents their viewpoint, and then everyone has a take on the final diagnosis. Lastly, like the magic box, the pathologist has a final say and gives what the actual diagnosis was. Since it was a first, we didn't understand much. But it was an interesting 2 hours to spend.

So, life is abound with lots of sources of knowledge, and I'll make the best I can out of it all.

Gang Day and Traditional Day

The Cultural Week has ended on a high note. Yesterday and today have been awesome!! We totally nailed the meaning of Gang Day! Our theme was a Hawaiian one. Flowery t-shirts and jeans, coupled with a pair of Osho chappals, accesorised with garlands, flower-bracelets, chains and a flower pinned into the hair. We looked pretty great! Some other gangs in college came up themes like Devils, Mafia, a ZooZoo theme, Save the Tiger, Om Mangalam.......and a lot more.

We entered the lecture hall a little late, and the till then quiet class was suddenly echoing with the noise made by all the gangs together! This is College Life in its true sense. We had an awesome time!

Today, all you could see was vibrant colours and extremely pretty girls walking around amongst handsome looking guys. Its so strange how a simple sari or a simple kurta can change your entire persona in seconds!! Traditional day last year was sorta boring. It was all about clicking pictures and then BORED. Today, however, we were clicking so MANY pics, I didn't even realise how quickly time flew! I had the time of my life. Pluc my sari was very heavy, so despite the heat, I didn't want to change into something like a salwar-kameez, like I wanted to, last year. I wore a green sari. The colour really looks good on me.

Now, its the Freshers I'm waiting for, where it'll be total opposite of traditional. Haha!!!

Vedant '10 - The Glorious End

Here are the outstanding rangolis created out of just powdered colours, from the Rangoli competition held during Vedant '10.

The guy who made this has won a prize in all

the cultural events - Rangoli, Poster-Making

& Sketching. Bravo, Amol Deshpande!!

Our very own BJite bagged a little something.

very proud of you!!

A picture of two friends of mine, as we tried to detach the backdrop, to take it to Yashwantrao Chavan Natyagraha for the last event - The Group Dance Competition followed by the Prize Distribution and Dr. Salil Kulkarni's performance.

The Fashion Show held at Yashwantrao Chavan Natyagraha - 'Poise', was a success too. Our college came third and the top honours were taken by SOFT. I didn't go for it. Sadly.

The last day, was mainly a success due to Dr. Salil Kulkarni's presence. God, I am such a fan!! He's a big name in the Marathi Music Industry, and he was our Guest of Honour. I love his songs, and it was surreal to hear him first hand. I even got an autograph, and a photo with him. A friend of mine took the photo, so it'll be some time before that comes up here.

After the Prize Distribution and his performance, my group of friends had a sleepover. We had a lot of FUN!!! Pizzas and the cold coffee from Durga ( famous for its cold coffees)......I didn't stay up too long. We had college the next day, after all. I was the second to drift into sweet sleep...

Currently, we are still reeling under the lethargy of the entire show. But, now our much-delayed cultural week has begun, and next weekend would the weekend of our Freshers'.....God, thigns never seem to end!! After that, would be my Gnynaec Post-End. So, March is not going to be uneventful....

Lord, help me manage it all!!

Vedant '10 - Half Way Through

Yes, the week that I was dreading has come to an end. I'm in a dilema here. I have every right to be happy with the way things have turned out. And I also have every right to be unhappy too. The first event of the week and the Festival, the English Essay-Writing Competition, went well. We had 15 participants. Not bad. And some of them were different from the ones who'd registered. So, I was happy. The entire morning went off quite smoothly. One down, the big one still to go.

The Staff Debate was held in the afternoon. Frankly, the meaning of Staff-Debate is a few hours of entertainment for the less-entertained section of the crowd in BJ, if you know wha I mean. The topic was 'Live-In Relationships', and the speakers had a whale of a time talking about everything apart from that.

Tuesday arrived with a friend asking me to help out with the Solo-Singing eliminations. That was a pretty tough task, but the end-result was satisfaction and an eagerness to watch the selected participants sing on the final day. Overall, I felt glad I managed to help her out.

In the meantime, I started getting calls from people outside of college, interrested in paticipating in the English Debate. My earlier uneasiness regarding organising the event was vapourising off quite easily. I was feeling excited about it all. In fact, on Thursday afternoon, I even managed to get all the permissions for the chairs and the table-cloths. I was so excited about it all.

And then it happened.

4 people cancelled their entries. On the eve of the event. I wanted to hold somebody and shake them through and through till every cell in their body hurt. Why in the world did have to happen at that bloody time!! I'd been praying through the entire weekend that I did NOT want the event to happen. And just when I decided that I did want it to happen after all, somebody up there decided to listen to my long overdue prayers! Yeah right, that was so comforting.

It was of no use to hold the event. So, yes, I cancelled it all. Felt dreadful. It isn't right to do this, everything at the wrong time. Any way, point is, my work is sort of done.

Vedant '10 - Enthralling your souls....

It's finally begun! And I think I'm really nervous about it all. I so want the next week to get over as fast as possible. And I really really want my two events to go off smoothly. Its not exactly going to be very easy, but I'm still hoping its easier than I think. And, next time on, I'm only going to do something if I DON'T want to do it. I just wish I can live through the next week, in the same happy and a little carefree way.

Yesterday's Inauguration was great. My friend, Mohini, a Bharatnatyam dancer performed the Ganesh Vandana. She is just so beautiful and graceful, it was hard to to look anywhere else. Bharatnatyam is a very expressive dance form, and Mohini takes to another level. We also watched her Arangetram a few months back, and she just keeps improving and improving! Great going girl!! We all love you!!

Our Firodiya team performed the dances from their play. Firodiya Karandak is a prestigious Intercollegiate One-act Play competition, held in February every year. All colleges perform in the initial Elimination Round, and eight are selected for the Final round. This year too, we did not manage to reach the final eight. But, with the dances ready, it was only proper that the team performed for the Inauguration. They danced better than they had for the competition!!

Some of the Juniors had prepared a performance, and one other Junior played the Violin too. She was fantastic!

All in all it was good, and our Chief Guest, Sudhir Gadgil, went away very impressed. Now, we hope the rest of the Festival also manages to spread joy and creative wind throughout the college.

Labour, in every facet of the meaning

It started with the Seminar on Thyrotoxicosis last week, on Feb 8th. It was a wonderful experience. Standing in front of a huge audience and speaking as calmly as I did, I have to say to myself, "Kudos!!". I ended with the sentence, "Even though the thyroid gland is not essential for survival, absence of the hormones can cause physical and mental slowing and affect the quality if life." That raised up a controversy amongst the teachers sitting in the front. But, there were some who agreed with what I said, and frankly, I don't think what I said was wrong. The Thyroid doesn't decide the life and death of a person. Nor do the hormones. They make a person capable of living what is termed as a normal human life. My friends said I spoke a lot better than I had, during the rehersals. Personally, I'm glad I was able to stand up for myself at the podium, and say what i thought was right when the controversy came up. Plus, I got a certificate, which for me, is more important. You could say that I am selfish enough to participate in this kind of activity only for the certificates!!

Moving onto my next goal, after two days of running around and being tense that I might not be able to finish off with all the signatures in time, I have finally sent my Research Proposal to the Indian Council of Medical Research (ICMR). The results will be out in April. I don't care whether they choose my project or not, I'll be doing it any way. But, there is always a sense of achievement in having your project selected by such a prestigious body. Also, they choose just 500 such projects from all over the country. So, I guess, its easy to get what I'm trying to say. I just have my Ethics Committee proposal to be handed over tomorrow, and then wholly, and truly, I will be done with it all, till April.

After this, it is our Intercollegiate Competition Vedant to think about. I have to come up with my entire schedule to hold the Debate and Essay competitions. I don't know what the verdict on this time's Vedant will be after the bomb blast yesterday. But, lets remain hopeful.

Now, labour. In the field of Medicine. Overcoming my pre-construed aversion to the process of Miracle of Birth, I watched 3 normal deliveries and a Caesarien Section (CS), yesterday, during my first ever Emergency Duty (ED) of my term in Gynaecology and Obstretics. The Caesarian was a textbook operation. We've already had our clinic on the step-by-step manual of performing a CS. Yesterday, we had a practical version. The deliveries were a little gross, but the babies when taken out looked really, really cute. As luck would have it, we didn' see any girls being born. It was all male babies. Hmm, maybe next time!!

So its been eventful, this week. And I really hope, next week is a little less taxing. Ciao!!

PURANDAR 2010

Purandar totally ROCKED!! I had more fun than I expected to have and, once again, found the ardent love I feel for all things Nature.

We left on the 29th, i.e. Friday afternoon. One State transport bus filled with around 103 2nd years and around 7 seniors. It was very stuffy. Obviously. Reaching the foot of the fort by bus took an hour and a half. I could feel my excitement rising as we wound through the streets of my dear city, the noise of the guys singing right behind all of us.

Once we had reached the foot, it was time to haul our heavy back-packs onto our poor backs and start the rigorous journey to the top. It took us a long time to actually manage to reach our base camp. The path uphill wasn't the most difficult in terms of climbing. It was steep and dusty with very few proper foot holds to utilise. Of course, our bags didn't make it any easier.

One of the first rules of ascending a hill or a mountain is that, you shouldn't stop. Making a stop on your way up for a few minutes makes you more tired. All the lethargy that seems to be a centimetre away while walking, floods into you, pushing you into the static inertia from which it is tedious and more energy-consuming to rise. I tried my level-best to put that stop at bay. I could feel the heat and blood charring my face, I could see the redness that my arms were slowly producing, and I could here the vapours of hot sweat leaving my face, as I puffed my way up. Our leader's calls of, "Just five more minutes!" helped in a very small way to actually keep us moving. At one point, I decided not to pay any heed to all the mountain-advice buzzing in my head and I sat down. I deserved it. We had covered 3/4th of th journey, and I had boiled to limit of vapouring into thin air. My mom's advice was now ringing in my ears - " Don't do anything life-threatening." This wasn't exactly that, but I didn't have to wait to move into that category, did I?

Pressing Matters

The exams having finished, and my voice and health having returned to more or less normal (I can sing now, without flinching at the sound of my voice!), I now turn my attention to two pressing matters: The Thyrotoxicosis Seminar which will take place on the 5th of Feb and the final decision on my ICMR (Indian Council of Medical Research) Project.

We had a rehearsal of sorts on Thursday (21st Jan) for the Seminar. My presentation took 15 mins, more than 2.5 times the alloted time. I have to cut down on a lot of matter, something which I am so NOT interested in doing. I've spent ages on making the presentation just right. Lets see what my guide has to say about what we can cut down upon. But, as such the experience of standing up there and talking was brilliant. I did not have jitters. That might not be the case on the 5th, when there would easily be a huge crowd, and the venue would be the MGA. I'll be doing all that I can this week, to make sure I'm fully prepared.

The ICMR project deadline has come, and it is the 15th of Feb. Having come down to two topics, I'll hopefully be making a decision and submitting a report to the Ethics committee of our college for approval of the project. I am hell-bent on doing this project and I do hope things work out well.

Moving onto the earliest and most enjoyable event of all, we have a trek to Purandar Fort next weekend (29th, 30th, 31st). This reminds me a lot of the Lohagad trek we had last year, and I can't wait to go for another one. We will have a meeting mid-week so that we can be told of the itineary and the stuff we need to carry. But, I'm a hundred percent sure this trip will be a major fun trip for me.

The weekend was a welcome break for me, with all the remnants of my illness bearing down on me during the week. Also, we missed out on almost 17 days of our paediatric posting because of the terminal examination. So, the last week in college hasn't been a restful one, complete with 3 hrs being spent in the wards. I love paediatrics. The patients are so CUTE!!! And, I get to unleash all of my sweet side onto those patients. We have an amazing lecturer teaching us too. A Dr. Chhaya, who has a certain way with children and us too. I really wish we had been able to finish the entrie posting. It would have been an experience. But, now I do know that there's one branch I wouldn't mind specialising in.

And I saw my Micro marks. They are pretty ok. I've passed by a fair amount. It wouldn't have hurt to score a little more, bu then medicine isn't about scoring marks, it's about learning and enjoying the subject. So, that has been able to console me a bit.

This week has been fun. Hope the next one is too :-)

OVER!!!

And so they are. No more formalities left, and no more last minute prayers. My exams have officially ended and I am taking the deepest sigh of relief I can manage.

Practicals turned out to be ok. When I look at each of them separately, of course, I can easily point out the best and the worst. Because, I did have them. So, since I do have time right now, I'd like to reveal my best and worst. Here goes,

12th January, 2010:

FMT- We went and waited for almost an hour and half before something actually happened. And that something was quite an event. One of the peons told us that we'd been called in groups of 10. I got up ( I am amongst the first ten in our batch from r.nos. 145-174). Making a quiet and steady line, we went to the cold room where they conduct all the post-mortems. God! The only thoughts wandering in my otherwise empty mind, were," Crap, please don't tell me you are going to take the Viva here!!! Surrounded by dead decaying partially open bodies!!! I'll faint before you manage to finish your first question!"

The HOD was there, with a fresh body beside him. A 'mama' (that's what we call the ward boys in coll) was standing next to him, fully loaded with knives and scalpels, already having finished half the job of removing the viscera. This was the body, our HOD told us, of a criminal, killed on the previous evening. He had received three bullets, and the bullets were being looked for, in the viscera.

Frankly, this is what I'd expected to find when I came into medicine. A dead body, as fresh as live.....raw, red blood oozing out on every cut.....the viscera all shiny red with sickening yellow mucous attached at places....the bones looking all glistening yellow.....

One entire year and I finally saw what I was looking for. It was quite a sight! The criminal definitely looked like a criminal. I could imagine him, and the scene around him, when he was alive. He looked frightful even in that state!!

The HOD showed us one bullet which they had managed to find, and the organs it had managed to pierce. The liver looked bright red, and very innocent!! (the second batch that went in, came out telling us that the second bullet was found in the liver. It didn't remain innocent any more!)

The only thing that grossed me out more than the dead body, was the smell. We're used to formalin now (although it never fails to bring tears into my eyes:-( ). But, the smell here was the one associated with the slaughter-house, the cutting up of raw meat....the smell of dead rats...the usual smell we all run away from.

Thankfully I did not faint, and came out pretty impressed. The viva took place after that and I had a good time. I had our HOD questioning me and I answered everything. It was a satisfactory viva, and I think he understood that I knew my subject. He looked particularly excited when I mentioned 'Panchanama' and descrobed what a warrant was. Day 1 was successful amd satisfactory.

13th January, 2010:

Pharmacology- The first thing to mention here is that I fell ill. Again. I got another round of cold and cough, and fever in the evening. I think it is Pharmac. Even before the theory paper, I was in a state. But, this time was worse. I decided that it did not matter, how the practical went.

The spots were a little tough. But, I think I got the drugs right in the table-work. I'd expected to totally be lost when that came along. So, I was more than just satisfied. The pharmacy viva was good and simple. My label turned out to all correct, and I answered all the questions correctly. There was a lot of participation from Dr. Momin (my examiner), with his gestures of agreement. So, I'm assuming that to be a good sign. The grand viva was plain horrible. I was reminded of what Anatomy used to be last year. The difference was that this was worse, because instead of a PG student, I had in front of me, a Professor, who got the impression that I was at the other end of the intelligence scale. It hurt. Illness not withstanding, I did not deserve such a bad viva. But, it was over, and thats all I cared about.

14th January, 2010:

Microbiology- The one started with tough spots. They were pretty out of the world. But, I realised later on that I had got the Spore Stain correct, and I couldn't feel more proud of myself. if I could get that, I could definitely get above 5 in the spots. The Viva on culture media and biochemical tests could have been better. I knew the stuff she was asking, but I needed her to prompt a bit. But, the 'her' in question was Dr. Suvarna Joshi ma'am, who was smiling all through. Its always nice to have a teacher in front of you, who can put you completely at ease, and calm you down. And Dr. Joshi's smile does exactly that. So, despite knowing that I did not do as well I could have done, I came back saying that it had gone pretty ok. The Gram stain and Zeihl-Neelson stain were a little messy. A lot of pink and purple on the fingers. Also, it is difficult to look for bacilli in the ZN stain. Luckily, I showed that slide to Manoj sir, and he said wat I thought was the bacillus, was actually a bacillus! Wow, that's new! I'd neevr gotten the hang of ZN staining. The Gram stain was easy, and I got Gram +ve rods, which the teacher said, were correct.

Dr. Dohe ma'am took my grand viva. It revolved around the two stains only. She only asked me about differences between Bacillus and Clostridia, because they were the differential diagnosis of my result in the Gram stain. I liked the viva a lot. I answered almost everything. There was some question, to which my answer was,"I don't know", but I don't even remember what it was. She asked me if I was a localite, where I stayed and said I could go! I felt happy and at ease.

15th January, 2010 (today):

Pathology- If there ever were an average practical, this would be it. The spots were good, the slides were easy. The first viva (on the two slides I had to identify) was ok. I could answer some, could answer a question on Typhoid. The slides in question were, that of Acute Ulcerative Appendicitis and Tuberculoid Leprosy.

The grand viva was ok. She didn't ask me much, I answered a fair amount. Nothing that led to "I have no idea ma'am", but nothing that had me jumping up and down with the answer. So, thats what it was.......quiet.

Note: Pathology might have gone better if I hadn't ended up with my worst stage of laryngitis today. Now, I have even given exams in this dreadful voice!!

So, thats the description. Its pretty easy to decide the order of practicals according to my performance. So, here goes.....

1. FMT

2. Micro

3. Patho

4. Pharmac

Thats my order of liking. And my marks should be accordingly. I'll come to know within in a few days...

Till then, it is going to be two days of complete rest and silence. I can't even bear to hear my voice. And I desperately need to eat, sleep and live like a loser who has nothing to do in life :-)

Ok, now eyes are tired and the HCl in the stomach is screaming out aloud for food to acidify. Hail, 2010 again!!! May the start be a good one!!

Year 2010.....Begins...

Happy New Year to one and all!!! We’re half way through our terminals, and I have already suffered through the horrors of having to stay up late into the night. It is my fault. I HAVE to do everything one day before the exam. To my luck, we had papers in the afternoon. So, I was able to do whatever I wanted to.

The papers have been good. Pathology was the best followed by Microbiology and then Pharmacology. I would partly blame my cough, cold and fever for the debacle that Pharmac was, but then, it would also be because I was never as well-prepared for Pharmac as I was for the other two. Forensic Medicine and Toxicology was good by its own standards. I’d spent more than half of the time I had for preparation, sleeping. So, considering all that I’d managed to study in the rest of the preparation, I had a decent paper. I wrote everything I knew, pushing it into one answer or the other. Over all, I had a much better terminal than the one last year. Of course, practicals are still left. They start on the 12^th and finish on the 15^th. But, I should say I’m quite satisfied with whatever I’ve written. The rest of my satisfaction can only be determined by the marks I manage to procure.

I’ve spent the past two days resting a bit. Not that the cold has reduced a lot, but at least I’m feeling much better than I was two days back. Now, just waiting for my practicals to get over so that I can breathe a breath of relief.

The New Year again this year, wasn’t very great. I was studying. And I haven’t made a lot of resolutions this year. I’d just like to be a little more regular than I have been in the first term. That’s all.

I definitely hope that 2010 brings, in terms of peace and brotherhood, a surge of hope for all of us. It hasn’t started all that well. What with the lastest news about a policeman being beaten to death by some criminals in front of the stopped cars of two Ministers. And, the Ruchika Girhotra case which evokes the dormant barbaric anger from the deepest corners of our hearts. 19 years on, and the sheer position of the accused is enough to help him get free with just a fine!! We talk about our country moving ahead, as new years come. But the examples we see seem to pointing in a completely different direction.