Hmm, First Day Revisited

So a year back, today, I put my first foot into BJ, on my first day. To be truthful, I was shit scared, dead nervous and halleluva worried about going there, a college filled with seniors ( read: authority to rag), meeting about 190 new faces, and ( as I'm accustomed to do) judge a lot of the new people I saw, deciding who to mix with and who not. Don't get me wrong, I'm not very biased or snobbish or arrogant or anything. But, a little bit of it is there in every individual, and I am quite frank about what I think. So, yes, I do tend to be judgemental, and get biased against a person if he squashes his first chance.
It is one of my primary shortcomings, I think. Something that forces me to take time to open up to people and mix around. But, hey, this entry isn't about my character study. Its about my first day.
I didn't go to college today. I probably should have, with the importance of this day and blah, blah, blah.... I just didn't want to. So I have missed out on my first look at the Juniors ( I'm finally a Senior!!!! Its relieving. I can actually look around and talk about people younger to me.).
And it is some look, that. Of course, knowing us ( me and my group of friends), we probably won't go around hunting for a group of 'localite' first years, ready to give our lecture on life in BJ. At least, the girls won't. And I already know some of them, so if they need anything, they'll just hunt me down ( not that we need to hunt people down. Just wait in the Lobby, and you'll have familiar faces walking around you.).
You know, my first day in BJ was BORING. Nothing happened, really.....and reading my entry of 1st August, 2008, I didn't feel very excited either. So, lets hope that these people have a better first day, and don't come to hate us, like we hate some of our immediate seniors.
Best of Luck guys, I'm sure BJ is going to be as great a home to you as it has been to me, in the past one year. :-)

One year- Part II

One year back, we officially took admission into BJ Medical college and became students of the same, thus fulfilling the dreams that most of us have had for many years. For me, as I have often repeated even in my blog, it was a dream come true of the wildest kind, because I had never expected to get this college, in spite of studying as hard as I had. So, I'm just glad, happy and mostly feel very lucky and indebted to God for the opportunity that He gave me by admitting me into this college.
This year, the list of colleges allotted to students through the CET has been declared again. And there are many students who's dream have been fulfilled. Having experienced that myself last year, I just want to thank God for doing that for these students too. And, as a senior ( I hope, since the results are not out yet..anything can happen...and its me, we're talking about here), I would only want to hope for the best for the batch of to-be Doctors who enter BJ on 1st August.

ONE YEAR

I am the kind of a person who believes in holding onto the goodness of the past. And, more so, certain special days. I look back at such days, read my diary entries and reflect. The happiness, the joy, the relief...whatever it might have been. I tend to feel those emotions again and simply live that day again.
I wonder why I do it. I've wondered a thousand times. I have never really been able to answer the question with anything apart from, " Because I am like that!" In many ways, I don't want to let go; don't want to really believe that the day no longer is as important as it was then. After all, do we do that with Birthdays? Or Anniversaries? Even Deaths are remembered. So why not the day when I got my Std. 10 result? Or the day I stepped into the real world? Or the day when Liverpool won the Champions' League? They are special to me. They are days I want to remember 50 years down the line. Because they mean something......and something special.

Thats hardly the introduction I would have wanted for this entry, but never mind. A long introduction always has its magic. Its June 14th, 2009. And today I celebrate the one year anniversary of my CET results. Its very strange calling this an 'anniversary'. So I guess I'm going to say, I celebrate one year since my results. One year since the day I realised that, all that sweat, and toil and ( using my favourite phrase, here) "working my ass off" had finally paid off. I was reserved a Government Medical College seat.....Something I had not thought, would happen to me, all during the time I was preparing for the entrance examination.
I can remember every moment of that morning. Contrary to my usual style, I got up half an hour later. At about 8:30am, instead of the normal 8:00am. Mom had just left for the hospital ( she had an early cataract to cater to). Dad was almost ready. And me? Well, I got up....sat for sometime thinking about the importance of the day, and then said " Chuck it..I don't really expect anything much!" and got out of bed. After all, not all morning dreams actually end up being real, do they?
We had been told that the results would be out by 11:00 am. So I took my time. Brushed my teeth, read the morning newspaper ( end to end, for a change) and decided to get dressed. All through, my dad continued like a stuck gramaphone record really, " Why don't you check your result? It must have come out by now. Come on....I know you want to do it yourself....Please!"
I have a routine. Everytime, I have to see any result, whether its an entrance test, or match score, I make sure I have nothing else left to do, before I sit to check it out. A bath, breakfast, getting my bed tidied up, getting my hair right, saying a small, "Please let it be what I want" to God, taking my Luck-pendant with me...everything.
I said to Dad, I'd do it at 11:00am, and well, I had to do everything else before it. I could sense the desperation and frustration and absolute irritation, in his eyes..... For all the times in the world when I had to stick to my 'routine'!!!
Finally, giving into his incessant nudging ( nagging, really), I decided to check it out at 10:00am. I said it wouldn't even be up on the net yet. The scheduled time was 11:00am. Well, as fate would have it, the result was there. Pretty much what I expected. I had expected a 176 out of 200. I got a 177 out of 200. What I didn't expect, was a rank as high as 545. It made me wonder for a bit. A score as low as 177 and a rank like 545!! Something is a little wrong here.
And, well, Mom came home and things cleared up. It had been a low-scoring test, unlike the previous year, and with 545, I was sure of a Government Medical seat. The rest of the day went by in a blur. Meeting my teachers, distributing laddoos, and smiling!! I had fallen in love with BJ Medical College, the first ever time I saw it. I always put that down to the fact that I was never going to get in there, anyway. But, now I actually had a chance!! I've always thought I have the tendency to perform much beyond my expectations. This was one of them. In a way.
Of course, I wasn't sure of the college I would be getting into, but I guess, celebrating a seat was enough. And we know the story now, don't we? I did get into BJ, and I have never been happier!!!!
So, to June 14th: the day that pretty much changed my life. I had, literally, trained myself to believe I wanted to get into an engineering college, till this day when I saw that 545. Just want to remember how wonderful the world started looking after that one look at the computer screen :-)))

The New Year

I am terrified of the idea of writing my paper tomorrow. And when I say terrified, I mean it. I am going through the usual, pre-exam ritual of forgetting things, that I had learnt so well about a day back, so you see it geta a little tough. Still, I might manage somehow in Anatomy. Physiology is nowhere within my reach at the moment, and half a day is just not enough any way.
So obviously, my New Year's resolution is to study more, and more regularly. So that by the time I finish with my first year, things won't be in the state they are right now. How glad will I be when Jan 9th gets over!!
Its the first time I haven't stayed up till 12 to welcome the New Year. But I guess, things do change with time. And 2008 wasn't all that great. I got into BJ Medical ( something way beyond my dreams) , yeah. But the life after that hasn't exactly been a smooth sailing. So this was a mixed year. Regrets? Not many. I wasn't able to write my usual favorite year-end in my diary yesterday. That has been a hard one to swallow. It just won't be the same when I write it on the 9th.
Well, gotta get back to pushing things into my head now. Just really nervous. I want at least 30 so have to make that happen. I am gonna be happiest creature on earth when I finish with the terms.....And even happier ( and that is possible) if I pass all my subjects! I promise to study more and regularly, God! Just let me off this time and pass me in all three,PLZ!!!!